Monday, May 30, 2005


Memorial Day

Memorial Day

A day off work to picnic, party, swim, boat and celebrate summer…

I grew up in the 60’s and 70’s. It wasn’t a time to be patriotic. Our nation was involved in an “armed conflict” of questionable merit. It wasn’t like WWI or WWII. Even our troops weren’t sure why they were in Nam. I spent most of my teen years worried that my big brother would have to go over there. Then I spent my late teens worrying that I would have to go there. I was in the last draft lottery. I pulled a 27. If the draft hadn’t ended I would have been on my way.

Now that I am older and wiser, I am sometimes remorseful that I didn’t go. Even though the cause was unclear, I know now that it is important to serve and protect the interests of this great country. I have taken to reading about the civil war and WWII. It’s kind of weird to realize that the Civil War was really not that long ago. The last veteran of that war died within my lifetime (1958). WWII vets are still all around us, but their ranks are thinning. Now I watch The History Channel and see Vietnam Vets interviewed and they look old.

I think about my dad and my uncles serving in WWII. I think about friends of mine who served in Nam. I think about the kids of my friends who have served or are serving in the Mid-east. I remember the day I visited “The Wall”. I sat on the ground and cried. I cried out of grief for the 58,000 who died in Nam. I cried for the 600,000 who died on our own soil so that all could be free in this country. I cried for the WWI & II vets who never came back from places like Normandy, and Sarabachi. I cried for the Korean vets. I cried for those who did come home, but left part of their souls in those dark and dangerous places. After a time, I felt a sense of calm and peace. I realized I wasn’t alone. I was surrounded by veterans and non-veterans all feeling the same wave of emotions. The calm and peace I felt was the souls of those departed telling me that they were alright, and that their sacrifice was not in vain. I gave thanks for their patriotism, commitment, bravery, and sacrifice.

I lowered my flag to half-staff this morning…I prayed that God would continue to bless this land, that God would protect this great country, and that God would comfort the families of those lost in battle to preserve our freedom, and that God would make his presence known to those who live with the haunting memories of war, and that God would grant eternal peace to those who died in service so that we might picnin, party, swim, boat and celebrate summer.

Saturday, May 21, 2005


"I'm a Ford truck man..."

Wonder of wonders, miracle of miracles....

The wierdest thing happened yesterday...

I bought a new Ford Truck. I negotiated the whole deal online and over the phone. What was wierd was that when I went to pick it up, the deal didn't change. The dealer was not only helpful and honest but get this... they found me a better interest rate and the price/payment came down...not only that, they added in windshield breakage coverage and wheel/tire damage insurance AND gap insurance.

I have purchased a lot of cars in my life, I think this is the first time I have been treated with so much respect and honesty...

Congratulations Mullinax Ford in Amherst and specifically Pete Tobias ( internet sales guy ).

Friday, May 20, 2005


Peace Officers Memorial Week

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

A little help from your friends

Dear Wendy:

I am so sorry to hear about all the problems you are having ever since that nasty woman in California accused you of putting fingers in your salads. I know that you have lost a lot of sales because of this. I am so glad she was caught and I hope she is punished appropriately.

I am writing today in order to offer some assistance in rebuilding the Wendy’s business and reputation.

Since I do have a background in marketing and advertising I try to offer my services whenever possible to organizations like yours that are in the midst of a crisis. To that end, I have developed a creative promotional campaign that I believe will not only put you back on top of the salad dispensing world, but will allow you to turn this unfortunate incident into something that will get you free, positive media exposure…

Picture this… a simple ad campaign titled… “Wendy is giving you the finger”, or “I got the finger at Wendy’s”. Either one will work.

Now, here is the premise of the promotion. Since the finger was planted, and there never was a slip up on your part, you have nothing to be ashamed of. You should take advantage of the whole finger in the salad thing, by running a nationwide promotion in which you encourage people to buy a salad in the hopes of discovering a finger in their salad. (The finger would of course be plastic ). Any one finding a finger in their salad would automatically win a prize matched to the “finger print” on the finger. Since all the fingers would have to have a different print, you could encourage people to collect all the fingers of the same print. When they get an entire hand, they would get a free trip to Palm Springs! Of course for anyone to get a full hand you will have to throw in a thumb once in awhile. You could call this the “thumbs up winner! Perhaps just getting a thumb could get the recipient a one night stay on some roadside motel somewhere along Route 66. Other prizes could include free manicures and acrylic nails, “Isotoner” gloves, “Palm Pilots”, free chicken fingers at your restaurants…etc.

I can see people really getting excited about the whole thing. Wendy... you could end up on Letterman!

I would be happy to coordinate this effort with your existing ad agency. (Quite frankly, I am rather disappointed and surprised that they have not already thought of this. You might consider a new agency.) You may contact me through the email address listed below.

Finally, I recommend that you get going on this before Kohl’s Frozen Custard in North Carolina steals the idea. It has already been reported that a customer found a finger in his custard…It is only a matter of time. Damn, nobody has original thoughts anymore.

Your friend,

Jim

Monday, May 02, 2005


Just ask me...

Big Fish

One of my favorite recent movies is “Big Fish”. If you aren’t familiar with it, it is about a young man’s perception of his father’s “fish stories”. I am especially fond of the movie because my kids never believe the stories I tell them about the things I have done and people I have met.

In a nutshell…A friend of mine and I saved Hal Holbrook from getting hit by a New York Taxi. I met privately with Bernadette Peters in her dressing room. I once drove Della Reese to an eastside Cleveland drug store at 2:00 in the morning. I partied with Martin Mull. I was on stage once with Bruce Springsteen (see my post from Dec. 15, ’04). I pushed jazz great; Woody Herman around in his wheelchair after his car accident. I helped create the original marketing plan for the soft-drink “Mello Yellow”. (That one really gets them going) I got into an argument with magician Harry Blackstone. I once told Liza Minelli’s manager to “shove-it” and got yelled at by Mickey Rooney and Jerry Lewis.

I won’t even get into how I may have saved President Bush…

Someday, when Variety Magazine reports: "J Zak Drps Ded", the kids will know, that I didn’t make this stuff up!